She's Half Way Gone.

When we think about raising children, our time with them in the house usually ends at 18 when they become an adult and go off into the big world. We envision sending them off to college where they will make many mistakes and celebrate many successes.

We look at this future and pray we do everything we can for them to become productive members of society. There is one thing I did not take into consideration when I first became a mother.

How fast 18 would come.

Next week my oldest turns 9. No biggie, right? Oh, but it is. It dawned on me earlier this year that my "time with her" in the house is half way done. She is half way into this vision I've had of her waving to me as she drives with a car full headed to her new future. A future where she will always need me in one way or another, but she won't always call on me. A future I hope my words of wisdom will prove to be valuable to her.

Here is the thing. I look at her and know I've done something seriously right. I am no saint and am definitely not a perfect parent. But somewhere along the way, I know I hit the nail on the head.

She is intelligent, well spoken, passionate, silly, and so much more.

I was dreading her turning nine until something happened last week. I slept in. *GASP* I know. Sinful.

But I was simply exhausted and apparently so were my alarm clocks (the two Littles, Bean and Bubba). So I just didn't wake up.

It wasn't until I felt a nudge and heard a soft voice that I woke up. "Hey, mom, I'm headed to school. Just wanted to let you know and give you kisses".

Guys. She got up (she has an actual alarm clock), fed herself, got dressed, wrote me a small note, and then rode her bike to school all on time. *side note for those who may be curious, she rides her bike daily to school so don't worry about that*

Her independence never ceases to amaze me. Her level of maturity is beyond her age. She's just incredible.

When this happened I was stunned. She could've simply stayed home and used my sleeping in to get a free day off. She didn't though and I'm so proud of her for it.

If this and many other examples of her character are any sign of the future, I am doing just fine in the parenting department.

So, even though I'm "half way done" I will revel in each day I have with her. I will celebrate her birthdays with a smile knowing that with each year passing is one step closer until the big 'ol world will get to benefit from her entering it.

Happy Birthday, Mona Lisa.

I am Not a Single Mother: Military Spouse Vent

A week or so ago I came across an article on a pretty popular military spouse site and in this article the author compared a woman with a deployed spouse to a single mother.

Before I dive head first into my vent, let me be very clear. I am NOT a single mother. Not because it's a "bad thing" but because I am, in all cases, not one.

By comparing me to a single mother you are missing the mark and diminishing the absolute strength single mothers have. This isn't to say military spouses aren't strong but we aren't "single" in any capacity just because our spouses are deployed.

We have a husband/wife who is there for us emotionally and financially, along with many other things. Maybe they are gone so we don't have the physical back-up but that doesn't equate us to a single mother.

If you are a woman with a deployed spouse and consider yourself to be "like a single parent", I encourage you to really look into what it means to be a single parent.

I want to point out that I get the loose concept of being compared to a single mom- I do. But if someone tells me "Sarah, I don't know how you do it, it's like you are a single mom", I will be happy to clarify that I'm not. Maybe it is meant as a compliment, or maybe even a "bless her heart" moment, but I just don't agree with it.

Single mothers, you are amazing. Your determination and independence speaks volumes about your character.

I am grateful every day for my husband and will never take his support, near or far, for granted.

Military spouses are many things. A single mother is not one of them.

Dear single fathers,
I know my blog speaks directly to single mothers but I see you, too. I see the incredible impact you make on you child(ren)'s. This speaks directly to mothers since it is in response to something I specifically read.